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Wolf in My Heart

Can't Have The Cake

It had been days since Eva had run up to the CDC, There wasn’t much to do there when it was just two people, and one of them was always focusing on research. Eva tried to make herself content in watching Jenner try desperately to fix his mistake and work with what few flasks he had after the decontamination. But it was obvious it was all in vain. Eva had managed to get her wildness to effect Jenner enough to be able to pull him away from his work, often enough where the two of them would not go insane. Eva came down the stairs into the Lab, her hair a mess and back into her old attire, white tattered tank and baggy blue jeans. Her hair a mess but why bother, right? “Trying to take over the world again Brain?” She muttered sarcastically Jenner chuckled a bit but never looked away from his work. Eva leaned over onto the table and watched him. “Why don’t you just give up? You know there’s not enough left to make a difference” She said “Because just trying is making a difference. If I learned anything from my wife…that was it. You always have to try…or you might as well be dead. Right?” He said Eva nodded and thought about it. Jenner was odd, but she liked him, he made her really think about things, he made her want to be better, He would also call her out if she was wrong, and no one did that with her anymore. No one dared to. “so basically, get busy living…or get busy dying right?” she asked straightening up a bit Jenner chuckled a bit “if you want to put it that way, yes” He said, suddenly Vi the computer pulled up the security screen. “What’s going on?” Jenner mumbled, Eva watched the screen in confusion. She watched as a group of people shot down walkers in front of the CDC, they looked familiar. A gasp came from Eva’s lips as she spotted that sheriffs hat and her heart stopped. “Rick” she whispered. “Rick, that’s rick! Those are my friends!” She called looking from the screen to Jenner. “We’ve got to help them…let them in” She said urgently. Jenner looked unsure and once again She could see he was hiding something form her. Eva frowned “Please….It’s like Candice is out there” She added calmly. Jenner looked down at her before walking off. “Stay here” He instructed. Eva nodded and smiled a bit.

Eva thought for a minute and then turned and bolted for the stairs, she ran to her room, and went through the left over clothing for those shorts she had found, she quickly slid out of her jeans and into the shorts, running to the small mirror she turned every way she could looking herself over, her tattered tank top showed a bit of her midriff being torn a bit, and the shorts left her toned strong legs open for the world to gaze upon. She smirked and shook out her hair and fixing it a bit. She was barefoot and quickly rain back to the stairs. She wanted to be a site for Ricks sore eyes, and she wanted him to feel what she felt when He bad practically returned form the dead, in all ways. Eva listened intently on the group as she heard them walking through the halls. Vi put the building back on lock down. They were almost to the Lab, she could hear them. Eva went down the stairs and stood with a playfully sweet smile on her face, that hide how coy and giddy she was. How bitter she was. She smiled at Jenner who nodded as her as he lead her friends in. as he stepped out of view Rick and Shane’s eyes fell on her. “Eva” they each managed she locked her eyes on Rick looking in him and down, He was dirty, sweetly, bloody, out of breath, breathing hard, and she was driven crazy by it. But she managed to tear her eyes away from Him and slowly break out into a well-planned sprint towards both he and Shane. Only she rushed right by Rick and into Shane’s arms. He held her close to him pressing her body as close to his as possible. Eva cupped Shane’s face and kissed him as Deeply as she could, a smirk on her lips as she did so, before hugging him and hiding her face in his neck. Shane’s hand wandered into his hair resting on the back of her head. “We’d thought” Shane said. “I know what you thought...” she muttered “what I wanted you to think…what I wanted him to think” she thought letting go of Shane she turned to Rick, Who hugged her tightly. Lori looked at Eva distrustfully as the Green eyed girl embraced her Husband. “I could Kill you” Rick said his voice cracking. Eva smirked and backed away from him. She rested a hand on her hip and let the other arm fall limp. She simpered and twitched her body stating “You wouldn’t neither” playfully. He chuckled. “Eva” Carl called rushing her along with Sophia. Eva kneeled a bit and hugged the children “I missed you guys so much… I see you kept the seniors citizens in line huh?” she joked Carl looked up at her and smirked “it wasn’t easy” he said, Rick laughed at his son before looking up at Jenner.

Eva’s eyes locked onto Lori’s and dangerous sparks seemed to bolt between them. Eva slowly got to her feet and carried herself strongly she flipped her hair and smiled, her smile was full of herself. “I’m glad you’re all ok” she said as she went through welcome backs and hugs with Carol, Andrea, Glen, T-dog, and Jacqui. She and Daryl were never on good terms. He saw her for what she was, and all he saw was a whore. But he didn’t know her any deeper than that, while all she saw was a redneck hick. She just nodded at him and then turned her gaze to Jenner. She eyed Rick coyly with a small smile, border lining flirtatious and just being friendly. She wanted to make him think, and she wanted to make Lori worry. Eva then turned her eyes to Shane, she looked him up and down biting her lips before walking off up the stairs, and she’d figure Jenner was going to give them the rundown of the Lab. She waited for the group to find their rooms, she leaned against the door to her room with a sly smile as the group headed to their rooms. Shane walked to her and grabbed her hips pulling her pelvic to his “hey, ugh you, you been in the shower yet?” He said huskily leaning his forehead to hers. Eva bit her lip and shook her head giggling silently. She rubbed her hands up his arms, feeling ever muscle he had as she tilted her head “the waters nice and hot…” she said her eyes side glanced at Rick who exited the room he had picked out with Lori, she Grimaced at the site of him following her before looking Shane in the eyes as he too watched after her. Eva wrapped her arm around Shane’s neck and pet his neck with her pointer finger gently “I could give you a rub down… a massage, you’ve traveled a long long way…babe. It’s been a hard road.” She said lightly deepening her voice. Shane looked back at her and smiled “mmmh a rub down huh?” he said pulling her closer Eva giggled loudly and smiled up at him. Rick glanced at the two before following after Lori who rolled her eyes at Eva. Eva grinned inwardly “you can’t have them both” She thought grabbing Shane’s hand she lead him to the showers.

Eva and Shane’s activities could be heard from the stall beside them, this stall just so happened to contain Rick and Lori. “That’s Sickening” Lori muttered as Rick held her close letting the warm water fall over their bodies. Rick smiled faintly “aw their just having fun, their happy to see each other” He said kissing her neck and biting her ear gently, Hinting with his voice and his actions, he wanted to play the same game. “It’s inconsiderate. They’re the last stall but there are other one at least one side of them” Lori continued on ignoring Ricks gestures. Rick sighed and gave up “yeah well” He managed but he couldn’t say much it was more then what he was getting. Shane Had Eva pinned up against the wall she held onto the shower head with her legs wrapped about Shane’s hips. He moaned softly as their act was finally done, she looked down at him her eyes clouded over. It had taken all her mental strength not to call out the wrong name, she smiled down at him friskily but it was not him that her eyes saw, rather than Rick. “A few more times like this and I’ll forgive you for leavin’ and driving me insane. You coulda been Bit, the living ain’t as friendly as the rest of us, they could have gotten you did god knows what” Shane ranted Eva rolled her eyes as Shane let her down, freeing himself from her. She a chill went up her spine as he did so. “Yeah I missed you too” she said sarcastically. “Don’t be like that” He added touching her face. “You started it” she added the words were close to being biting but Eva covered it up well. She could hear the water in the next stall go off. In turn she turned off their water as well. “Come on…don’t want to be late for dinner right?” she asked. “Hell no, a hot meal that ain’t something Daryl shot down, you Kidding me?” He said with a chuckle. Eva laughed as they wrapped themselves in towels and exited the stall.

“Have fun?” Rick asked Shane amused as the two couples exited their stalls in sync. Lori glowered at Eva who smiled innocently looking up at Shane “damn babe we’re some loud asses” she said laughing a bit “the louder the scream the better the f-“ “shhh!” Eva said shutting Shane up “kids in the place you know?” She added playfully. “You didn’t seem to be too concerned about the children when you were in the stall” Lori muttered walking away Eva and Shane frowned. Eva wanted to call her out but she knew better, she was going to play the situation very well. Eva looked down at her feet in fake shame “Rick I…” she stammered making her voice smaller “I didn’t mean, I mean we didn’t mean to offend anyone or anything….It’s just we got caught up and I…I thought. Well I missed him….an’…’” She continued on as if she was greatly embarrassed, she had grabbed Shane’s hand and hid behind him a bit. Shane wrapped an arm around her waist “yeah man we didn’t mean t-“Shane started “Don’t worry about it Lori’s been in a kind of mood lately…I don’t know why but…I’m sure she didn’t mean it, you guys weren’t all that loud enough for others to hear besides the next stall” Rick said resting a hand on Eva’s shoulder. She smiled gratefully and inside she was smirking in victory. “We better get out the halls half dressed in that case” She said laughing.

Eva was the first one dressed, she pranced into the Lab with a smile on her face and helped Jenner layout the food. “You’re happy” he said with a small smile. Eva twisted her waist and upper body left and right “yes I am” she said. Jenner looked at her intently “but what are you really happy about?” he asked as he watched her lay forks down. “The fact that Ricks back in your line of site, that Shane the man you’re with is safe, or that you can go back to causing Lori stress...” He asked. Eva smirked “all of the above sounds just about right…actually causing Lori stress is a bonus” she said with a sneer. “Don’t do this to yourself…one day it’ll go bad…you’ll feel awful when the time comes. You’re a good girl, I can see it.” Jenner warned Eva chuckled “yes sir” she said mockingly. Jenner sighed and shook his head.

The night was jolly as the group ate and got familiar with one another again. However to the women of the group one thing was ruining this otherwise perfect night, and that was the hostile air between Lori and Eva. They were subtle about it but it was their and Jacqui, Andrea, and Carol could feel it, see it. Andrea and Eva had been friends since they met up, the girls were a lot alike in some ways, Eva saw herself as stronger. Carol having known Eva from her past Job didn’t trust her, she knew she was promiscuous and proud of it. Sides were defiantly taken. Jenner happy to see other happy thought such trouble, and liking the feeling of having others around him again, brought out the last remaining wine bottles. Within her 5th glass Eva leaning on Shane, who was holding her down to stay in her chair with his arm. He and Rick knew all too well Eva was a dancing Drunk, and her form of Dancing was not kid friendly. “Hey Carl why don’t you and Sophia go check out the Rec room huh?” Rick said Carl nodded and the two children left. Shane sighed and removed his arm from across Eva’s legs. “What’s wrong?” Jenner asked. “Eva’s a dancing Drunk” Lori muttered darkly “dancing?” Jenner asked. Shane chuckled, we’re all adults here, Eva, Eva” Shane said tapping on her shoulder as she had been talking to Andrea “Shane don’t” Lori warned. “Oh come on, we’ll consider it a means of thanking Dr. Jenner for, for his generosity” Shane said. “Yes babe?” Eva said to the unknowing eye she didn’t look drunk and didn’t even talk drunk. Shane smirked at her and ran a hand through her hair “want to dance?” he asked. Eva giggled and smiled “sure” she murmured standing up in her chair, and to some unknown Music in her head, she danced moves she had done time and time again late nights during her shifts. “Whoa” Glenn muttered watching her shake her hair around amongst other things. “This is shameful” Lori sighed. Andrea laughed “you’ve gotta admit she’s pretty good” she said trying to hold back their urge to laugh more. Carol shook her head and rolled her eyes. “The poor child’s drunk, this isn’t fair” Jacqui muttered. “Whoo!” Shane called clapping. Rick shook his head “maybe this is a bit much” he said as he got up out of his chair. Jenner followed suite and the two men managed to coax Eva down. “Come on it’s time for you to go to bed” Rick said leading Eva away.

In her room, the prospect of being alone with Rick sobered her up quick, but Eva still played the part of the hopeless drunk, a Little lost soul. After all it’s how most people viewed her, bad parents, bad relationships, she was just looking for love in all the wrong places right? Only to the eye that didn’t know any better, Eva had long ago come to terms with her past her family, and she used the typical stereotypes on women like her to pull on the heart strings of those around her. It made her feel stronger, to be able to trick otherwise sensible and smart people. And there was not a thing she would fail to do to get at the heart of rick. Eva through her arms around Ricks Neck, and smiled impishly “dance with me!” she giggled “no I don’t think that’s a good Idea, Eva” he said with a smile, Eva grinned in fake stupidity and half true giddiness at the very sound of his voice. How she loved his voice, every bit of pent in ruggedness, a deep rumble like the gentle and roaring Crackle before the roll of the thunder or a bolt of lightning tearing open the sky. “Please?” she pleaded with a pout Rick chuckled “Eva you don’t know what you’re doing” He said setting her down on the bed. She knew every bit what she was doing and she loved his faithfulness yet she hated it all at the same time. “Go to bed Eva you need rest” He added, Eva smirked and reached to grab his hand as he went to turn away. “Stay” she said softly, purposely slurring her words a bit “I can’t” he said softly as she swung her arm back and forth swing his with her. “Please…there might be walkers under the bed…Protect me like you did when we were young” she added with a small smile. Rick cracked a smile this time. He now had thought she was just innocent, drunk and afraid. After all his childhood friend, couldn’t possibly not even drunk see him as anything more than that older brother like figure. Right? Rick sighed and sat at the edge of the bed as Eva curled around him “fine but only for five minutes…” he said. Eva grabbed his hand and pretended to drift to sleep. She fought he urge to smirk as Rick brushed her hair out of her face.

Soon Rick went to leave, it was late, now though, once he was gone Eva awoke form her ‘sleep’ and sat on the bed she looked blankly at the covers. She had him for a moment, but it wasn’t good enough. She didn’t just want Sex from him like most men she’s chased. She want all of him, she wanted his time, his thoughts, his hugs, his troubles, his flaws. Because of this she hated Lori in a way, she might have stood a chance if Lori never came into the picture. Lori had all that we wanted from Rick plus his child and his undying love. Eva gripped the sheets, in side she was bitter at Lori as well as herself. Because Eva wasn’t stupid she knew even if she could break the two apart…it would cause Rick pain, even if it was only for a little while. The Door to her room swung open, “Shane?” Eva asked as he stumbled inside. He looked mad, very mad, he looked hurt to, and he was also very drunk. “Shane?” She asked again. He got on his knees in front of the bed and reached for her, wrapping his arms around Eva’s waist he pulled her to the edge of the bed. She sat on her knees as he hide his face in her stomach. “Shane” she sighed as she ran her fingers through his hair, he relaxed in her arms and dropped the empty bottle of liquor to the ground. Eva didn’t know what wrong, but it’s the kind of bond she and Shane had always had, He never told her anything emotional, He kept it hidden, but would come for her for comfort, to curl up and make it Go away. Weather it was love or just a strong bond of friendship, neither knew, the lines were so blurred now. It didn’t matter, it was in times like this that Eva loved him, it was in times like these that’s she felt a connection with him. “Let’s make it go away huh?” She said gently making him look at her. “Huh?” she asked He nodded and slowly stood up and bit, Eva laid back on the bed and allowed him to crawl on top of her. He removed her clothing and unbuttoned his pants before leaning over her again. He kissed her deeply before planting quick wet kisses down her jaw line, then her neck, and lower, lower still. Eva could feel him pulsing against her, she took him in her arms and He shivered. Then it escaped his lips in a lustfully and drunken slur of a moan.

“Lori”

Notes

Tried not to be raunchy, Title obviously taken form the staying "You can't have your cake and eat it too"

Comments

Please update soon!! I cant wait to see where this story goes!!! Id love for her to end up with Shane!! Love your writing!!!! :)

I couldn't stop reading once I started. Please update soon

racheljewell racheljewell
5/2/14

@hope_is_real
thank you will try and update soon

Dixology Dixology
12/27/13

I love this so much!(:

hope_is_real hope_is_real
12/21/13

@LovingtheGrimesandDixons
Thank you very much, I'll try to keep updating in a good amount of time :)
I love Kate too

Dixology Dixology
12/11/13