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Never The Same

Chapter Four

Never The Same Chapter Four

Three Weeks Before The Apocalypse-2:09 P.M.

Avery who had been working the labor and delivery floor sighed as she sat down, her eyes drifting over to Patty Taylor who was also a nurse here at Harrison Memorial and one of Shane's ex's.

"Busy day?" Patty asked making Avery raise an eyebrow. Patty wasn't even looking up from her charts so how did she know Avery had been looking at her?

Avery nodded, "More than busy," she laughed as she reached for a chart herself and looked it over. "I never knew so many women in King County were due this week," she smiled as she thought of her own due date. She would find out for sure at her ultrasound appointment tomorrow just how far along she was and when she was due though she suspected she was at least three months pregnant. She had calculated in her head and the timing seemed right.

"Avery Walsh to emergency, Avery Walsh to emergency," a voice spoke over the hospital intercom, bringing Avery out of her thoughts and also made her look up from her charts. She wasn't sure why she was being called to emergency. She hadn't been down to work it at all today.

Standing from the chair she looked over at Patty who was looking at her curiously but not saying anything. "I have no clue why they want me down there," she spoke up before leaving the nurses station and walking down the hallway. She was trying not to think the worst, that maybe she was being called to emergency because Shane had been hurt in the line of duty. Killed in the line of duty.

"Don't think like that Walsh," she spoke to herself as she rounded the corner to the emergency room, pausing briefly as she saw Shane standing by two chairs. Two chairs which held a visibly upset Lori and Carl. It was then that Avery knew it wasn't her husband who she was being called down here for. She had been called her because of her brother.

Moving her legs again she finished the walk, stopping in front of Shane who just looked up at her, his eyes looking so helpless and scared. "Rick was shot," he speaks his voice breaking only slightly.

The moment those words left Shane's mouth Avery felt her knees began to buckle and she started to fall, though before she could hit the floor she felt Shane grab her.

"We were on a chase..we thought we had them all but there was one more. He shot your brother when he was turned away," Shane continued trying to let Avery know what happened. "He was shot where his vest didn't cover," he sighed finishing the story of what happened.

Going silent as Shane talked Avery felt as if she was dreaming though she knew she wasn't dreaming this. Her brother had been shot while working. "You couldn't see the person?" Avery asked feeling angry as she looked at Shane. "You are his damn partner, you couldn't keep him safe?" she asked her voice rising as she moved away from her husband's touch.

Shane frowned at Avery's words, "It was too late by the time I noticed," he spoke up trying to get Avery to understand things. "I couldn't prevent this from happening."

Avery shook her head as she felt tears sting her eyes, "Is he in surgery now?" she asked her tone still coming out like she was angry at Shane.

"Yeah, they took him to surgery not long before paging you," Shane confirmed wanting to reach out to her but the way she asked her question let him know she was still angry.

"If he dies then I will blame you," Avery blurted out letting her emotions speak. "You should have protected him," she whispered before turning away and heading to god knows where. She just needed to be away from Shane, away from Lori and Carl who were as equally in pain as she was.

Sitting in a chair in the waiting room Shane looked over at Lori and Carl. Carl was busy playing some hand-held game and Lori was just staring off into space. It had been an hour since Avery ran off and there was still no sign of her showing up again. She blamed him just like he was sure Lori blamed him too, hell he blamed himself for this. He should have been a better partner, Rick was like his brother and Shane had failed to have his back today.

Looking up when he heard someone sit down beside him he smiled sadly when he saw Jessica, Avery's best friend. Jessica had came down here to the emergency room not long after Avery had ran off. She had been on lunch when Avery got paged and came here immediately after she finished her lunch though by that time Avery had already left and Shane had asked if she could find her.

"No luck in finding her?" he asked feeling like Avery deliberately didn't want to be found, that she was avoiding everyone right now, even her closest friend.

Jessica shook her head some of her blonde locks falling into her face. "I found her in the chapel," she confessed a tiny small showing. "But I think it's your place to go talk to her. It's you she is mad at not me," Jessica reasoned.

Shane nodded knowing that Jessica was right. His wife was mad at him and it was his place to go after her. Standing up he looked down at the blonde. "Can you stay here with Lori and Carl?"

Jessica nodded her head yes and Shane smiled turning his back to her as he walked off to the hospital chapel. He should have known she'd run there. She only ever relied on God when crisis's came, he had learned that after Rick and Avery's father died two years ago. She had started going to church more and saying how she needed god because her life was falling apart.

Shaking his head he stopped in front of the chapel doors, it wasn't that he thought her relying on God was crazy it was just that he didn't believe in God or that he could make things right.

Opening the doors Shane spotted Avery sitting in the front pew and he walked towards it soon sitting down beside her. "Up for some company?" he asked her as he let a hand rest on her thigh.

Avery looked over at Shane, "Why not?" she asked no longer sounding as mad as she had before. "The church isn't full today and my mind is a lonely place right now," she frowned as she felt tears stinging her eyes. She had been crying off and on since she came here to the chapel.

Shane frowned as well when he looked over at his wife. She had never been so helpless around him before. "I'm sorry," he told her before squeezing her thigh lightly trying his best to comfort her. "I'm sorry I failed Rick today."

"You didn't," Avery told him as tears went down her cheeks. "I'm sorry if I made you feel like you did," she spoke feeling guilty for how she had treated him. "I got so scared once I knew what happened. All I kept thinking about was my dad's wreck and how fast he died. How Rick who is my rock now that daddy is gone could die too. I was just angry at the thought of losing him."

"You won't lose him," Shane told her, his voice sounding more sure than he actually felt. The truth was he wasn't sure that Rick would make it but right now everyone needed him. Lori,Carl,Avery and even his unborn child. They all needed him to be the man here. "I did fail Rick though," he whispered before pulling Avery into him.

It didn't matter what she had said about how she reacted. He knew he had failed Rick and now to make things right he would look after Rick's family. He would be their rock until Rick could be that rock again.

Avery frowned at Shane's words but she calmed down when he pulled her into him. "Have they brought him out of surgery yet?" she asked as she rested her head on Shane's shoulder.

"They hadn't when I left," Shane answered her question. "We should head back there and see if they have now," he said before moving away and standing up.

Avery looked up at him, "I'll be there in a second," she told him. "I have a prayer I want to say real quick then I will be down," she nodded watching as Shane gave her a look almost like he didn't want to leave her here by herself but he did it anyway. After he was gone she shook her head, standing from the pew. She knew there was no prayer she wanted to say that had just been an excuse.

Leaving the chapel she walked down the hall towards the restroom which she entered into in a hurry. Going to one of the stalls she quickly pulled her pants down along with her panties, her eyes going to the red stain in them. Ever since learning about Rick's shooting she had been cramping.

"Fuck," she hissed out sharply standing from the toilet which now also had blood in it. Pulling her pants and panties back up she flushed the toilet and left the stall. Going to the sink she washed her hands before exiting the restroom. She knew before she went back to Shane she would need to get seen herself. She would need to know that their baby was alright.

An hour later Avery finally made it back to the waiting room seeing Shane reading a magazine. "Sorry it took me so long," she said as she sat down beside him. "I had to get some tests run," she admitted not wanting to have this conversation now but knew it couldn't wait until later.

Shane closed the magazine he had been reading, "What kind of tests?" he asked her. "And I thought you just needed to say a prayer."

"The prayer was a lie," Avery confessed again feeling guilty for things she had said to Shane today. "I was cramping. I have been ever since I found out about Rick so I went to the bathroom to check. I was bleeding when I checked," she whispered as she locked eyes with Shane, seeing an understanding of her words soon appear in his eyes.

Shane swallowed hard when he realized what Avery was saying to him. There had been something wrong with their baby. "The baby?" he asked her as he showed concern. He knew when she had told him she was pregnant two weeks ago that he hadn't been thrilled. Adding a baby when money was tight already wasn't how he pictured things but he had come to adjust. Come to want this baby just as much as Avery had.

Avery frowned when he asked about the baby. "I miscarried," she told him her voice still silent. She didn't want Lori to hear her not when Lori was already suffering with her worry over Rick. "The baby is gone."

At her words Shane went silent. There baby was gone and he couldn't help but blame himself for this too. If she hadn't been worrying about Rick then she wouldn't have lost their baby.

"I'm sorry," he finally spoke before reaching for her hand and bringing it to his lips, kissing it softly.

Avery smiled sadly when Shane kissed her hand, "We will get past it just like we got past your cheating," she told him though she knew deep down she would never truly get past his cheating on her. "And we will get past Rick's shooting too. He will make it out of this surgery and everything will be okay."



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