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The Trolling Dead

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It was an apocalypse like no other, seemingly the end of all of the good in the world. It was chaos, where war broke out and people fell. Mindless freaks were wandering the streets, feasting on others' brains. Wait, zombies? No no no, these mindless freaks are bad fanfic writers taking people's good ideas for their own, or just making a completely crap fic. This is an internet apocalypse. The trolls are our only saviors.

Toasty was the first. Born Shane Walsh Fan 2.0 and a pretty cool dude, he had a tough life of his own. He witnessed a poor boy named Carl Grimes beaten to death with fluff and cuteness and stood up for the poor, redneck badass man. Because of it being called trolling, he was forced to change his name. VV_WalkingDead was born, but from then on he dedicated his life to saving more Daryl Dixon's from the same fate: being made into a total pussy. Sadly, his identity was compromised again and forced to change to Toasty, this time by another strong troll, one of the name BossTrolling. A character started out as a simple writer in the WDFF site. With a great fic and seemingly charming personality, this Merle look alike had it all.

BUT DID THEY REALLY?!?

Anger flooded through their system at seeing the site starting to be compromised by horrible writers, falling back on smut and Bethyl popularity. With a vengeance, they assumed the identity of BossTrolling, seeking out these awful writers and putting them on blast. Many tried to immitate them, but none could match the trolling power. Over the world of WDFF, it seemed as though he had taken over as King of Trolls.

During his reign, a virus spread over the world of WDFF, a virus that plagued everyone and turned them into writers who were illiterate, relying on Bethyl/smut/stupid pairings, or those who you could question if they even watched The Walking Dead. Aside from there differences, BossTrolling and Toasty both had one mission: get the virus of shitty fics out because oh my god they flood the fucking story thing and they're god awful.

"We're not safe here," BossTrolling said, turning to face his arch nemesis. Though they fought for the same cause (and failed because bad fics were everywhere), there was tension between them, extreme tension. They were locked inside of a building. They had barricaded themselves in when the mindless freaks started rising from their fics and began writing more, killing and feeding of the brains of other people because they ran out of ideas. As more and more bad authors fell to the plague, the less good ideas were circling, leaving them just wandering, searching for their next fic feast.

Toasty, who looked abnormally like Rick Grimes but with a comically large head, turned his Python (a gun, not a snake ;) ) over in his hands, shaking his head as he looked out the window to the mindless freaks outside. "Too dangerous."

BossTrolling slammed his hand on the table in front of his, dramatically, like one of those action movies. "We have to do something! We can't just let this go on!"

Toasty turned, anger in his eyes. "What the fuck are you going on about 'we', mate? Ya tink ya some ol govna pip pip? I from Livapool I'll beat ya down tha sidewolk ya ninny!"

BossTrolling just rolled his eyes. "Sidewalk is an American term. In Liverpool they say footpath, but enough of that shit. Now I may hate you and you hate me, but we need to end this! Together we can do it!"

Toasty and BossTrolling stared each other down for a good three minutes ten seconds. Finally, Toasty nodded his head. "Let's go."

The set out to the streets and were immediately swarmed by a group of mindless freaks. They looked to each other and nodded, knowing what they had to do.

"YOU HAVE SHITTY GRAMMAR!" Toasty screamed to the closest one, and the thirteen year old girl quickly fell over and died.

"Hey! Keep your mean opinions to yourself!" a peacekeeping person hidden behind a really bad copy-paste TV show fic shouted.

"BETHYL!" another mindless freak screamed, grabbing onto the back of Toasty as he was distracted by the peacekeeper freak.

BossTrolling noticed as Toasty tried to scream out a troll comment or critism, but the two teenage fangirls were overwhelming him. For a second, BossTrolling considered letting him be taken down, but then quickly jumped into action, leaving his own group of mindless freaks to help his enemy.

"BETHYL IS NEVER GOING TO HAPPEN AND YOU'RE JUST FANGIRLS!" They fell over dead and Toasty fell with them. BossTrolling held a hand out to help him up, and Toasty took it. They looked each other in the eyes in understanding, nodded, and then set off to work on the giant horde surrounding them.

"RICK IS OOC!"

"NO FOURTEEN YEAR OLD IS GOING TO BE THAT BADASS WITH WEAPONS AND SURVIVE ALONE!"

"CARL WOULD NEVER EVER SAY THAT WHAT THE FUCK?"

"WHY THE FUCK IS BETH SINGING?!?"

One by one or sometimes in groups, the two began to take down the freaks. At one point, they had to rip a fourteen year old freak off of a poor Daryl Dixon; she was humping him to death in a raging hormone outburst. "DARYL IS NOT A CHILD MOLESTOR!" BossTrolling shouted. With one last scream, the teenage mindless freak fell dead. Poor Daryl did not survive however. Toasty had to shoot him in the head after Daryl started uttering Shakespeare and speaking in soliloquies, too damaged from the fourteen year old romance. Poor guy.

They were nearly completed with their mission, with only a few mindless freaks still wandering. Toasty sighed, his hands on his hips. "Good work, by the way."

"You too," BossTrolling said back.

Out of nowhere, though, a shadow ran across the way, and then a katana was shoved into BossTrolling's stomach and then Toasty. They both yelled out in pain before slumping to the ground. The shoutings of the mindless freaks got louder--they were getting closer.

They looked up to the figure who had stabbed them. It was a Michonne Barbie.

"Why--why--" Toasty started.

"You are Shane Walsh Fan 2.0, VV_WalkingDead, Toasty, and also Punk," the person said coolly. She looked to BossTrolling next. "You are IrishDixon, Luck of the Irish 2.0, and IhaveAnOreoCookieForAnEyepatch."

BossTrolling gasped, but as they gasped they coughed up blood. "How... how did you..."

"Lil' birdie tells me. And another lil' birdie told her and several other people. And that lil' birdie was told by somebody else," the Barbie smirked before continuing," I also took care of your little friend after I was told what I needed to know, EllieLovesShane, also known as PhilipBlake or Crazy Shane. Want my advise? Pick better friends."The mysterious person took a step back as the swarm of mindless freaks was getting closer. They were going to be left to be attacked.

"Who are you?!" Toasty yelled, terrified by the knowledge the troll had. "Why are you doing this?!"

The troll only smirked. "I am Kingpin-and-Mastermind," they declared loudly. "And only I CAN BE KING TROLL!" Kingpin ran down the street, shouting off troll comments to the mindless freaks and making them drop in packs. They were too powerful, and now BossTrolling and Toasty were stabbed and seemed to be at their end...

BUT WHERE THEY?!?!?w!?!@?@?

Notes

Celebrating the forum war with this little gem. ;)

Comments

@EllieWillowLavelle
xoxoxoxoxoxo <5

mischief_dixon mischief_dixon
6/27/14

I love you for writing this. This is literally the best story on here.

@Toasty is med
I am even more badass.

BossTrolling BossTrolling
6/27/14

Amazing new chapter!

BossTrolling BossTrolling
6/27/14

@thewalkerinme
I'm looking forward to see where it's going too, because I slowly think it's turning into 1/3 making fun of bad fics, 1/3 nonsense and random works, and 1/3 ranting XD

@Toasty is med
You are badass ;) No problemo babe xoxox

mischief_dixon mischief_dixon
6/27/14