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Solace

Chapter 42

“Dad!” Carl shouted, running down the steps as Tyreese stepped out of the house behind him. The boy ran to his father and they circled their arms around each other. “What happened? Is everyone okay?” he asked, somewhat out of breath.

Rick nodded. “We’re all okay. You don’t need to worry about those people anymore – we took care of it,” he replied, glancing at Lindsey over his son’s shoulder. It was one of those incidents they would all take to their grave.

“Did you ‘take care of’ Dean, too?” Tyreese asked, attitude lacing his tone. “Tell me, did you even think about including us in that decision?”

Glenn stood by with an expression of discontent. “Yeah, Rick…”

The former deputy looked between the two men and scowled. “You can’t honestly tell me that you’d be okay with a guy like that hangin’ around here! Glenn,” Rick addressed, pointing at him, “would you feel any differently if he’d been hitting on Maggie – asking you how to get into her pants?”

Lindsey gasped. “He said that?”

Rick cringed when he realized that he’d never brought up that conversation with her. Slowly, he turned to meet her shocked eyes. “Back at the prison…the day you saw Jared. I told Dean to stay away from you. Clearly, he didn’t listen.”

As Lindsey processed that new bit of information, he spun to face Tyreese once again. Glenn had backed off. Evidently, his comment about Maggie was the right one. Tyreese, on the other hand, wasn’t easily convinced.

“Personal matters that affect the whole group, need to be dealt with as a group,” the large man said. “What’s done is done, but you need to start thinking about people other than yourself.”

Carl surged forward. “Hey! My dad has done more for this group than any of you!”

Rick pulled his son back. “It’s okay, Carl.” It really wasn’t okay, but this was not the time to start something.

Tyreese shook his head. “Let’s just hope that we don’t end up needing him for any reason,” he said in reference to Dean, before striding away.

With a heavy sigh, Rick went to look at Lindsey, but she was gone. He furrowed his brow as he whirled around. “Where’d Lindsey go?” he asked Carl.

“I saw her go inside – it looked like she didn’t feel very good,” Carl answered, concern evident in his voice. “Do you think she’s all right?”

Rick tilted his head slightly as he struggled to come up with a response. “We just had to do some…unpleasant things. I think she’ll need a little time to cope.”

“Is there anything I can do to help?” Carl asked, hope shining in his blue eyes.

Quietly, Rick chuckled and patted his son on the back. “You could fix her a cup of tea. I know it’d be impossible for her to turn that down.”

“Okay! I’ll go make that right now,” he said, and rushed into the house.

Rick took that as his cue to go check on Lindsey. He was unsure what state he would find her in, but all he knew was that he didn’t want her to be alone right now.

*~*~*

Lindsey climbed the stairs, desperately seeking the seclusion of their bedroom. Her brain felt like a mishmash of conflicting thoughts and emotions. While she was relieved that Dean was gone, it didn’t lessen the uneasiness she was currently experiencing overall. Warmth burned her face and nausea rolled in her stomach.

After shutting the door, she made a beeline for the bathroom. She turned the knob on the old sink and splashed her face with cold water from the tap. As the droplets trickled down her skin, she made the mistake of glancing at her reflection. She’d never seen her face so white before, and the giant spatters of crimson only made it worse. An image flashed in her mind – blood…there was so much blood. Suddenly, the nausea surged upward and she barely had enough time to make it over the toilet. What little food was in her stomach came up in violent waves. When there was nothing left, she wiped her mouth and sat back against the wall.

She’d seen a lot over the span of her life, especially in the past year or so, but this had been different. It was easy to make the decision that these people, no – animals, needed to be dealt with in the same way that they’d lived. Essentially, an eye for an eye. The literalness of that statement made Lindsey shudder and fight to keep from vomiting again. She found it troubling how long someone could survive after enduring so many traumas to their body. One of her worst fears was to be dismembered while remaining conscious. Out of everything, that was what bothered her the most: she’d just carried out one of her worst fears on another person – make that multiple people – and she hadn’t even flinched.

Well, she was flinching now. Another grotesque image assaulted her and she hung her head over the toilet bowl. After a round of dry heaving, she fell back against the wall again. A soft knock echoed throughout the bathroom, and wearily, she lifted her head.

*~*~*~

“Linds?” Rick called softly alongside the door.

“Not right now,” she rasped from the other side.

He closed his eyes at the pain in her voice. “Are you okay?”

“I-I don’t know…” she mumbled.

Rick stared at the door, willing himself to be patient, when all he wanted to do was knock it down. “Please, Lindsey, let me in?”

Silence hung in the air for a moment, and then she spoke. “It’s unlocked. Come in if you want.”

When he entered the bathroom, his gaze fell upon her limp form. She was setting on the floor with the back of her head resting against the wall. Tears had tracked through the blood on her cheeks, turning them into red streaks. From the sounds he’d just heard, it was obvious that she had been throwing up.

“Oh, babe,” Rick whispered as he picked up a clean washcloth and held it under the faucet. Kneeling in front of her, he dabbed the cloth over her damp skin. He studied her dark eyes and tired expression as she stared back at him.

“I can still hear them screaming,” she slurred.

Rick exhaled a shaky breath. “I know…I can, too. But you said it yourself, it had to be done.”

“Don’t get me wrong, I’m okay with what we did, but I can’t say that I liked it,” she retorted.

“I didn’t either – none of us did,” he said as he continued to wipe the blood from her face.

Lindsey glanced at the floor and let out a tiny snicker. “Now I know how people develop drinking problems. I could really go for a shot of vodka right now.”

“That doesn’t sound half bad,” Rick said with a smirk. “How about a shower? That would probably help more than you think.”

“Yeah, I really need one,” she said distastefully, glimpsing her blood-stained clothes.

Rick offered her his hands and helped her up from the floor. “I’ll give you some privacy,” he said as he headed for the door.

“You’re not going to join me?” she asked, visibly disappointed.

“Not this time – I have some stuff I need to get done,” he replied, offering her a small smile.

Before he could leave the room, she whispered his name, and he turned to look at her. “Thank you for telling Dean to leave. I don’t know if I could have done it.”

“You could have, Lindsey. You’ve done harder things,” he answered in admiration, and then shut the door.

*~*~*

After her shower, Lindsey came out of the bathroom and found a steaming mug of tea and a note from Carl, telling her to ‘Feel better!’ The thoughtful gesture brought a much needed smile to her face. She’d have to remember to thank him later.

Feeling worn out from her bout of sickness, she napped into the early evening. When she awoke, the nausea was gone, so she thought it best to go downstairs and help Maggie cleanup from dinner. She threw on a pair of jeans and a black t-shirt, and then made her way down to the kitchen. She passed Tyreese in the hallway, exchanging awkward glances before he disappeared into his room. Hopefully, they would end up on better terms soon. In her opinion, Dean wasn’t worth the fuss.

Maggie stood at the sink, diligently scrubbing away at the load of dishes. Lindsey came up beside her and picked up the dishtowel. As she began to dry the stack of plates, Maggie cleared her throat.

“You’re not the only one having a hard time,” she confided quietly. “That wasn’t easy for me, either.”

Lindsey nodded in understanding. “I just hope that we never have to do anything like that again.”

The silence between them indicated that it was wasted hope, but neither wanted to say it aloud.

“Well, it sure made dinner interesting,” Maggie quipped with dark humor. “I think it extended our rations for at least an extra day.”

Lindsey bit her lip to keep from laughing. It really wasn’t funny, but it simply felt like the lines of sanity were beginning to blur. She heard the front door open and locked eyes with Rick from across the length of the house. He gave her a slight wave and then proceeded upstairs, presumably to go to bed.

“How’s Mina doing? I haven’t seen her all day,” she said after a minute.

Maggie shrugged. “She said that she was feeling weak and went to lie down. I’d be feelin’ the same way if someone cut off my arm.”

“That poor woman,” Lindsey mumbled as she dried the last dish.

“We gave her justice today – she was really grateful,” Maggie said, draining the cloudy dishwater.

The blonde woman focused her attention on the counter as she wiped it down. “Well, at least there’s that.”

“Don’t worry, we’ll get through this together,” Maggie said, squeezing Lindsey’s shoulder with one arm. “See you in the mornin’. G’ night.”

“Night,” Lindsey called as Maggie exited the room. Her mood was still in limbo, and she knew there was only one thing that would improve it. Allowing her mind to drift, she finished up in the kitchen and headed upstairs.

*~*~*

Almost asleep, Rick heard the bedroom door open and shut with a faint click. He lay under the blankets, facing in the opposite direction, but just from the footsteps, he knew it was Lindsey. A rustling sound filled the room as she removed her clothes and slipped into bed next to him. Within seconds, her soft hands were moving across his shoulders. He instinctively tensed on contact and then relaxed as her lips brushed the delicate skin on the back of his neck. Gently, she kissed across his shoulder and pressed herself closer to him. He blew out an unsteady breath at the sensation of her naked body against his back. When her hand slid over his ribcage and down, he stilled her hand with his own.

“I’m sorry, Linds. As much as I want to, I promised myself that we wouldn’t do anything in this bed,” he explained as he rolled over to meet her shadowy gaze.

Lindsey trailed her fingers over his chest, and he clenched his teeth at the sensations caused by her alluring touch as she said, “I understand where you’re coming from, but even he knew that things are different now.”

Rick didn’t say anything. Her gentle caresses were driving him crazy. He wanted so badly to hold his ground, but she was making it very difficult for him.

“Do you love me?” she asked suddenly.

Rick scoffed. “You know I do. Why would you ask that?”

“Because I think that would have been a good enough reason for him. You’re a good man, Rick, but you’re also human,” she whispered. He merely sighed, his resolve cracking. “Please? I just need to feel something that’s right, something that will take my mind off of everything that’s wrong.”

What the hell. Promises were made to be broken.

Rick moved over her, his weight pushing her into the mattress. Lindsey reached up for him, bringing his mouth down to hers with visceral hunger. His hands swept over her body before tangling in her hair. He savored the sweet taste of her lips on his tongue, which only increased his desire. He settled himself between her thighs and she lifted her hips, moaning into his mouth. Things were moving too fast for him. He wanted to take it down a notch – make it last.

While he was thinking of it, he pulled away from her and reached over the side of the bed into his bag. He withdrew a condom and tossed it onto the bedside table. They weren’t going to take any chances, and they certainly couldn’t have a repeat of last time.

When he came back to her, she glanced at the bedside table with a look of confusion. “But what about…?”

“Not yet,” he murmured.

Leaning over her, he touched his lips to the curve of her breast. Her body writhed beneath him, and he looked up at her wickedly. Lindsey’s chest heaved with anticipation, and he loved how her watchful eyes twinkled in the candlelight. His mouth dragged down her trembling stomach, dropping another gentle kiss on her hip. Roughly, he rubbed his hands up the inside of her thighs and she stifled a moan. There was something he’d always wanted to do, but had never gotten the chance. Tenderly, he pressed his lips to the scar on her leg, and she sighed. Her fingers threaded through his hair and urged his gaze upward.

“Please,” she whimpered.

Rick had more planned for her, but after hearing her beg, he lost all his patience. Quickly, he slipped on the condom and lifted her hips. He watched her expression turn to complete bliss as he sank into her, eliciting another moan from her parted lips. He drove deeply, bringing her to the brink, and then slowed the pace. Lindsey gasped in frustration, and he held back a grin.

Finally, he pushed home, filling her entirely. A sob ripped from her throat and he muffled it with his lips as he licked into her mouth, matching it with the thrust of his hips. Her cries grew louder with every second that passed. She arched her back and they found their release at the same time.

Rick rolled over and kept his arms around Lindsey, bringing her head down onto his shoulder. He drew in a gulp of air as her steady, feather-soft breaths tickled the skin on his chest. Affectionately, he kissed the top of her head and pressed his cheek against her silky hair.

God, he loved this woman.

Notes

Comments

@Corall
Aw thank you so much!! :D

bluecrush611 bluecrush611
5/18/16

I just finished reading this story :) and its the most amazing story ever :D

Corall Corall
5/17/16

@Kandy
No worries. I actually used Paint, haha. I just figured out what size the banner needed to be (by trial and error) and then cut the image down until it fit.

bluecrush611 bluecrush611
4/13/16

@bluecrush611

Also, Another Annoying Question. Where did you make that Banner of Lauren And Andrew? I need to get a good Banner place thingy and i need advice xD

Mother Dick Mother Dick
4/12/16

@Walker Witch
Thank you so much for the kind words and for following along!

@eventualprocrastination
Thanks for all of your comments! I actually just published a book, so that's the direction I'm taking for now, but who knows. Maybe I'll post something here and there. :)

bluecrush611 bluecrush611
4/10/16