Login with:

Facebook

Twitter

Tumblr

Google

Yahoo

Aol.

Mibba

Your info will not be visible on the site. After logging in for the first time you'll be able to choose your display name.

The New Resident

Chapter 50

Standing at the kitchen counter with her eyes cast on the task at hand, Carrie tried to maintain the pretence that she wasn’t eavesdropping. However only a minute or so passed before she gave up entirely, telling herself that it was necessary to listen, that she needed to be abreast of the situation. Setting the knife aside she looked up to the front door where Jessie stood talking to Pete, their voices only just audible from the kitchen. Out on the porch Carol stood behind Pete, supervising their conversation while Sasha stood on the pavement, guarding him. They’d been out there talking for about five minutes now, but even from the kitchen Carrie could tell that Jessie was holding her own, that she was standing her ground.

“He doesn’t want to stay over,” Jessie repeated for the third time, her tone calm and measured. “He’s told me that.”

“Just let me talk to him about it,” Pete pleaded with her, sounding genuinely upset. “He loves me Jessie, you know he does. He’s just afraid of what everyone’s been telling him, but he doesn’t have to be.”

“Well, he is afraid. He doesn’t want to sleep over at the Infirmary, even for Father’s Day.”

“But-”

“I said no.”

There was a long pause, and Carrie leaned to the right to get a better view of Pete. His face was screwed up, his hand running through his hair as he took a deep breath and thought about what he was going to say next. He was treading carefully, having no choice but to hold his temper.

“I’m his father. He doesn’t have to be afraid of me.”

“Well it’s a little late for that,” Jessie said bluntly, folding her arms.

“Jessie…I know what I’ve done. I know I’ve fucked everything up, but you’ve got to meet me halfway here.”

“I am meeting you halfway. You’ve taken Ron from me completely, and Sam goes to visit you, unsupervised, every day.”

There was a brief pause, Pete taking another deep breath. “I’ll talk to Ron, okay? I’ll talk to Ron if you talk to Sam.”

“I have talked to him. He’s going to church with you, he’s going to spend the entire afternoon with you, a-”

“I just want him to stay the night. I want to make him dinner, carry him to bed when he falls asleep watching TV, make him pancakes in the morning. Is that too much to ask?”

“Yes, it is too much. He needs more time.”

“Why?”

“Because like me, he still remembers.”

In spite of the situation, Carrie smiled to herself. It was such a relief to hear Jessie standing up for herself, to know that the support she was receiving from the people around her enabled her to do so. They’d been talking last night over a glass of wine, Jessie telling her that she’d never felt more empowered and confident than she did right now. In spite of Ron’s rebellion, her relationship with Pete was finally on her own terms. She still loved him, she didn’t bother trying to deny that, but she had known for a long time their relationship couldn’t go on any longer…things were finally on her terms again.

“Jessie, I-”

“Sam said no to the sleep over, and therefore so have I,” she cut him off abruptly. “Carrie will bring him to church with her at midday, and then she will bring him home at six o’clock. That’s my final decision.”

Ignoring Pete’s attempt to keep bargaining, Jessie turned on her heel and left, and though she maintained the air of confidence, Carrie could see she was struggling. In seconds Jessie had passed through the kitchen and sought refuge in the hallway behind it, giving Carrie a glimpse of her teary eyes as she passed. Though she felt empowered and confident, it still took everything she had to stand up to her husband, and to do so without showing how much it affected her.

Lingering on the front porch and ignoring Carol’s instructions to leave, Pete called out through the open door. “Jessie, please! Come on, he’s my son too!”

Rinsing her hands off at the kitchen sink, Carrie headed for the front door. She looked at Pete as she approached, pleased to see that although he was refusing Carol’s instructions to leave, he hadn’t tried to come inside the house. Whatever agreement and terms he and Rick had reached the other day, he was keeping his end.

“I’ll talk to Ron!” he appealed desperately. “Please Jessie, I’ll talk to Ron, just let me have Sam tonight! Just one night!” As Carrie reached the door Pete turned to her next. “Carrie, please can you talk to her? Can you just…”

He trailed off when she looked him in the eye, her expression unsympathetic as she began closing the door. After what happened in the Infirmary the other day he must be feeling pretty desperate if he was appealing to her for help, and this knowledge only furthered the sense of satisfaction she felt as she closed the door in his face. She looked at him through the glass panes as she turned the lock on the handle, the sound of its click the final indication that she was not going to help him. Interested in his reaction she stood there and held his gaze a little longer, unsurprised to see anger and hatred appearing on his face. There was a brief moment in which his mouth twisted into a snarl, his shoulder’s straightening as he tried to intimidate her, but it passed as quickly as it came.

Moments later his face fell back into despair, sadness filling his eyes as he looked into the house that had once been the home he shared with his family. Whether it was an act or genuine sadness, Carrie did not care, she was unsympathetic. While she’d never felt that Pete should be forgiven or made allowances for, now she felt even more strongly against him. Trying to destroy Rick had ruined any chance he had of her speaking out against him being exiled or executed. Now, it was no holds barred in her opinion…Rick ought to do whatever it was necessary to keep him in line.

Finally Pete turned away and left, politely brushing past Carol as he trudged down the patio steps and returned to the Infirmary with Sasha in tow. Having been present only to supervise his interaction with Jessie, Carol let him go and instead lingered on the front porch a little. Wondering if she wanted to talk to her, Carrie reached for the door lock, but Carol stopped her at the last minute. She gave Carrie a nod of affirmation, assuring her that everything was going according to plan, that things were okay. Grateful for this, Carrie smiled and gave her a small wave as she turned away and headed back into the kitchen. She resumed her former task of preparing fresh fruit for the punch she was making, mentally making notes of what she had left to do. Everyone was pitching in that day to prepare food and drink of some kind, and knowing how to play to her strengths, Shelly and Carol had assigned Carrie to organising alcohol and drinks rather than baking.

“Thanks for that,” Jessie said softly, emerging from the stairwell behind the kitchen. Her eyes were a little red and bloodshot, but Carrie didn’t mention it. “Sam was listening.”

“Is he okay?”

Jessie nodded, wiping at her eyes. “Yeah. He tried to tell me he’d stay the night with Pete after all, that he didn’t want us to fight, but I told him no.”

“Good,” Carrie muttered, believing Jessie had made the right choice, despite Sam’s offer. He’d made it abundantly clear he didn’t want to stay the night with Pete, that he wanted to come home to his Mom instead. Any last minute change of mind would be because of Pete’s influence.

“Let’s uhh…” Jessie deliberated, mentally collecting herself. “Let’s get finished up here,” she decided, picking up the piping bag of bacon flavoured frosting. “I’ll just need to do some quality control testing.”

Carrie grinned as Jessie piped a little frosting onto a spoon. With a long, gratuitous sigh she brought the frosting to her mouth and ate it, her eyes closing in delight. “Mmmmm….I needed that.”

“Quality control is important,” Carrie assured her, holding out a spoon for her own taste test. “Mmm, yes. That’s good frosting. You should probably try it again just to be sure.”

As she began laughing, the uncomfortable encounter with Pete began to fade from Jessie’s focus, her cheerful smile returning as she turned her focus back to the beer and bacon flavoured cupcakes she was making. It was barely eleven o’clock, and already it felt like Carrie had put in a full day of work. She had taken her usual shift on watch that morning, and although their shifts that day were shorter to accommodate more people being involved in the celebrations, Carrie hadn’t found time to rest. As she finished and began heading home she’d been immediately called upon to help the others clear Walkers outside the walls. With the Wolves out there they had originally intended to continue laying low inside the walls, but neglecting their duties outside was beginning to work against them. The Walker pits and spikes were full, and the build up was only attracting more than usual. On one hand Carrie could see the potential of allowing some Walkers to build up around them, that they’d act like guard dogs against any attack from the Wolves, but that too came with a risk. If they needed to leave the walls for any reason, whether it be a planned run or an emergency they would have dozens of them to contend with…hundreds if they let them keep building up.

It was exhausting work to contend with, even with Stacey in the watch tower taking out the worst of the Walkers still roaming around. The work was harder given she only had one hand upon which she could depend, and by the time they had finished Carrie was sore and tired, barely able to comprehend that there was still an entire day left ahead of her. She had stopped only long enough to shower off the Walker guts before getting to work on the drinks, and she still had a lot of work to do before taking Sam to church. Then there was the celebrations themselves to contend with, an entire afternoon filled with helping prepare and cook food, setting up gazebos and games for the kids, making sure everyone had a good time, not to mention the clean up.

Working as quickly as she could with her non-dominant hand, and wishing she had thought to start this the night before, Carrie finished slicing what little fruit they had before dividing it between the two enormous dispensers. Ensuring that one was labelled as for the adults only, she started added the wine, spirits, fruit juice and lemonade, taking care that she tasted it at various stages. Encouraging Jessie to have a taste too, Carrie hoped that Olivia had made enough ice to keep these drinks cold, knowing that she had been collecting ice from every household for the last three days. Putting on a celebration for sixty people these days was more complicated without the ability to buy most of their supplies.

“You should go and get ready,” Jessie told her. “I can finish this for you.”

“No, it’s okay. I have to get them all of this to the Pantry, and-”

“And you’re going to carry all those?” Jessie asked wryly, gesturing to the dispensers filled with lemonade and iced tea. “You and your broken wrist?”

“Well, no. I was going to sweet talk Eugene, maybe pull down my top a little.”

Jessie laughed in amusement, knowing she was joking. “Go on,” she said, giving her a gentle shove towards the staircase. “I can take care of all that, you don’t want to be late for church. Only Gabriel is allowed to be late.”

Grateful for the help, Carrie raced upstairs and started getting ready, having hoped she’d have more time up her sleeve. Having already showered after returning from the outside, she simply undressed and then slipped into the summer dress she had chosen for today. The only nice set of clothing she possessed was the skirt and blouse she’d worn to Deanna’s party three months ago, but since then she’d gained weight, the changes in her body necessitating a trip back to the Pantry to find something else. The dress she was wearing today was chosen with Rick in mind, knowing that he’d be there at church, that he’d be at the celebrations that afternoon.

It gave her a little kick to know that he’d appreciate certain aspects of what she was wearing, that his eyes would be following her throughout the day. In the two weeks since Carl had found out about their relationship the physical aspects of it had died down. But now things were changing, their relationship set to resume again…it would be nice to dress up a little for him. Her dress was modest enough to wear to church, but short enough that he’d have a great view of her legs, and so she’d chosen it with him in mind. However, the nude heels she slipped onto her feet were for herself, and just as she knew she would she got a little jolt of confidence as stood up in them. End of the world or not, she’d always love wearing high heels.

As she brushed her hair she went to the effort of putting on a little make up, nothing more than a little mascara and some lipstick, but it was enough. Just as she did with the shoes, she felt another jolt of confidence as she carefully applied the red lipstick, this having always been her colour. It felt good to dress up a little today, to take pride in her appearance and the way she dressed. Though it wasn’t something she was supposed to hope for given that it was Father’s Day, but a part of her hoped that she and Rick might find a moment alone together, that he might have the opportunity to appreciate her short dress close up.

“Sam?” Carrie called out as she walked past his bedroom. “Come on, I’m ready to go.”

To her surprise, she found him patiently waiting downstairs, sitting at the kitchen bench eating a cupcake Jessie had made. “I’ve been ready for ages,” he said proudly, wiping frosting off his upper lip.

“I was only five minutes,” she insisted playfully, knowing he thrived on it. “You weren’t waiting for ages.”

Ages!”

“Give me some of that,” she said quickly, snatching a small piece of his cupcake off his plate.

“Carrie!”

“Mmmmm,” she moaned, teasing him. “Yummy.”

Sam just rolled his eyes at her. “It’s fine, I can get another later.”

“Not if I eat them all first.”

“Mom!” he appealed for help, failing to suppress the grin that indicated he wasn’t really upset.

Jessie just shook her head in amusement. “Go on, Carrie’s ready,” she told him. “Finish your cupcake then wash your hands.”

As Sam put the last piece in his mouth and rushed off to his bathroom upstairs, Jessie turned to her gratefully. “Thanks for this, for taking him today. I know church isn’t really your thing.”

“That’s okay,” she said honestly. “Besides, I was going anyway…Rick asked me to.”

Jessie smiled at this, quirking an eyebrow. “Oh, really?”

“I’ve been thinking about going for a while now…at least once, anyway.”

“It’s a little nicer now that it’s in the church, not that tiny garage,” Jessie told her. “And Gabriel gives a good sermon…he’s not too boring.”

“Good,” she said in relief, having worried about this a little. She knew very little about Gabriel, having not had many interactions with him, and it constantly came as a surprise to know that he had arrived in Alexandria with Rick’s group.

His footsteps like thunder as he raced downstairs, Sam appeared back in the kitchen panting for breath. “I’m ready, let’s go.”

“Bye Jessie.”

“Bye,” she replied, hugging Sam tightly before letting him leave. “You’ll have a good day with Dad, alright? Don’t forget to take the card you made him.”

“Okay,” he said, hugging her back tightly and hanging on longer than necessary. When they broke apart he was still smiling, apparently comfortable enough to spend the afternoon with Pete, despite not wanting to stay the night.

Without further fuss they departed for church, Carrie lowering her sunglasses as they emerged into the beautiful June sunshine. When they reached the pavement Sam slipped his hand into hers, a gesture that didn’t surprise her. Sam was holding up well through his parents’ separation, but just like Jessie he too struggled, often showing different facades of strength depending on who he was around. Now that he didn’t feel like he needed to be strong in front of his mom, Sam was more able to show his vulnerability, the sense of apprehension he felt. He loved his dad, he wanted to keep their relationship…but he still remembered. With that in mind, Carrie was happy to hold his hand as they walked, happy to sit nearby in church as he had requested.

Feeling the warmth of the sun touching the skin on her shoulders, she smiled to herself as they set off up the road, hearing the satisfying sound her heels made against the asphalt. Though her day had felt like an uphill battle so far, she had a good feeling about the afternoon. The community needed to let their hair down a little, to relax and remember how to enjoy one another’s company again. So much had happened in the three months since Carrie’s arrival, the residents having endured quite the upheaval once they had discovered that the Wolves were close by. So much had changed since then, and for some it was difficult to embrace those changes as easily as the others did. Today would be an opportunity to change that, to not just celebrate Father’s Day, but for the community to be together again and relax a little.

It seemed Carrie and Sam were one of the last to arrive, and seeing everyone else filing into church ahead of them they lingered back for a few moments. As they waited she looked around curiously, seeing a few other residents who were already getting set up for the afternoon ahead. Erin, Barbara and Shelly were setting up tables while Sturgess and Abraham were erecting a large gazebo, needing to provide some shade from the warm sun. She’d seen Abraham on the schedule to take watch from the west post that afternoon, and she wasn’t surprised that he was avoiding the Father’s Day celebrations. Not everyone was in the mood to celebrate such occasions.

“Carrie.”

“Mmm?” she responded, looking at Sam just in time to see him putting his arms around her waist, pulling her into a hug.

“Thanks for being my mom’s friend,” he said quietly, mumbling against her shoulder as he held her tightly.

Her heart swelled with a mixture of sympathy and relief at this remark, sympathy for what Jessie and Sam were enduring, and relief that she had been able to help. She had known in advance that moving in and supporting Jessie would help her through this stage, but hearing Sam’s gratitude confirmed it for her.

“You’re welcome,” she said, putting her good arm around his shoulders and returning the embrace. She let him hold the hug for a few moments before gently breaking it, smiling down at him as she took his hand again. “Come on, we should get in there before Gabriel starts.”

Nodding, Sam followed her lead. “Okay, but he never starts on time.”

He held her hand only until they stepped onto the church’s porch, letting it go now that he had more people to be brave around. Feeling the shade come over her Carrie raised her sunglasses and looked around, pleased to see the church so full of life and chatter. Though she had jogged past it on many occasions prior to the expansion, the first time she had looked inside was last week. Then it had still been full of cobwebs and dust, its character and beauty marred by the distinct air of neglect. Once the construction crew had given it the seal of approval for its structural integrity, the residents had been allowed inside to clean and restore it to its former glory, and they had done just that.

The building was decorated as such that someone like Carrie, who could count on one hand the number of times she’d gone to church, felt at ease. Filled with the warm chatter of the residents who were slowly filling into the pews, the large windows and stone accents made Carrie feel a little more more comfortable…it wasn’t like the grand church she had once visited in Manhattan whose strong incense, candles and dark interior had been intimidating. This church aroused a sense of community and friendship, not one of intimidation or wrath.

As everyone began filing into the church pews and taking their seats, the aisle cleared to reveal Pete about halfway down, his expression concerned as he awaited Sam’s arrival. When he saw his son his shoulder’s sagged in relief, his concern turning into a genuine smile when he saw that despite his argument with Jessie that morning, Sam was there to see him.

“Wait, Sam,” Carrie said quickly, grabbing his shirt as he went to dash down the aisle. “The card.”

“Thanks,” he said gratefully, taking the Father’s Day card she had been carrying for him. He hesitated before running off again, and he looked up at her with those enormous blue eyes that never failed to make Jessie’s heart melt. “Where are you sitting?”

She glanced up and looked at the pews, relieved when she immediately saw the answer in the form of Tara and Eugene. “I’ll be sitting right behind you, okay?”

“Okay, thanks.”

He left without further fuss, turning on his heel and dashing towards Pete. Had it been anyone else joyously lifting Sam into the air it would have been a heart warming scene, Pete’s eyes clenched as he held his son tightly and kissed the top of his head. Standing back a few yards, Carrie watched as Sam gave Pete the card he had made him, beaming when he opened it with a smile. She glanced around the rest of the church, noticing that she wasn’t the only one watching the scene as it played out. Though they had no idea the depth of Pete’s violence towards Jessie and his grudge against Rick, they seemed to be watching Pete in concern, almost as if worried he’d break out into a temper right then and there.

“Do you want to sit with Ron and me, or with the other kids at the front?” Pete asked.

“I’ll sit with you,” Sam said immediately, sounding as though he genuinely meant it. “I have to tell you about your present. It’s not ready yet, but Mom’s finishing it, and then…”

As he ushered Sam into the pew where they were sitting, Pete glanced up at her, and to her surprise he did nothing other than simply nod…almost as if he was thanking her. Despite this, Carrie was not one who would be so easily manipulated. He had fooled her for long enough, so long that she hadn’t given Rick the support he needed as he tried to prevent Pete breaking Carl’s heart. She wouldn’t forget that, and nor would she forget the way he put his hands on her the other day in the Infirmary, the way he tried to hurt and intimidate her. So while she was forced to let him sit down between his two children, she wasn’t forced to let his false apologies and remorse fool her again.

A moment later her mind was set at ease, for although she was there to look after Sam, Rick was there for Pete. She should have expected to see him sitting in the pew directly across from Pete, the members of his family surrounding Pete on all sides. While Rick sat in the pew across from him, she, Tara and Eugene would sit behind. In front of him were Glenn and Maggie, while further along his own pew were Michonne and Rosita. Completely surrounded by them, Pete would have no choice but to behave himself, his current situation setting the precedent for how the rest of the afternoon was to proceed.

Coming down the aisle to take her seat, Carrie’s heart swelled as she walked up behind Rick, seeing that although he’d gone to an effort to dress for church, he still looked like himself. He still wore his black jeans with the patch on the leg, and the white linen shirt was unbuttoned at the top with the sleeves rolled up above his elbows. Looking perfectly content despite who sat across the aisle from him, Rick leant back in his pew while he waited for Gabriel to start, stroking his hand through Judith’s hair as she sat in his lap. Carl was beside him, rummaging through Judith’s backpack looking for something in particular. Like his father, Carl had gone to the effort of dressing up for church, but did he have any idea how similar the two of them were dressed, how alike they looked? They both wore jeans, both wore nice shirts with the sleeves rolled up…the curl of their hair and the way they sat beside one another was the final factor that warmed her heart.

Suddenly Judith looked up and saw her approach, and despite most often being hot and cold in her opinion of Carrie, today she beamed up at her. Following his daughter’s gaze Rick turned around, and she saw the unconscious reaction he had to her. He smiled when he saw her, but he also sat up a little taller and straightened his shoulders. It was cute, particularly the way his eyes dragged themselves down her body, his smile widening ever so slightly as he looked at her bare legs. Quickly getting himself together, Rick returned his eyes to hers and held her gaze as she sat down, and then he reluctantly turned back to Judith who was vying for his attention. Content to watch him at her leisure, she watched as he opened a small plastic container and held it out to Judith, but it was what she saw next that made her heart really skip a beat.

Seated beside his father, Carl had turned around and looked across the aisle towards her, and when she finally caught his gaze the strangest look crossed his face…relief. Feeling a brief surge of worry, she wondered what he was thinking, what was going through his head as he looked at her…and then he smiled. As if nothing had happened between them at all, Carl smiled and jerked his head ever so slightly, his way of non-verbally greeting her. Filled with disbelief Carrie looked at him blankly and then finally smiled back in relief. Other than their encounters at the chicken coop and the Infirmary, he hadn’t spoken to her at all since the day he moved out. While she had trusted Rick’s judgement and assurances that Carl was coming around and was trying to accept their relationship, this was the first indication she had from Carl himself. He smiled at her, he nodded to acknowledge her arrival. The gestures were small, perhaps insignificant to anyone else, but to her they meant a lot.

“Tara,” she said quietly. “Carl just smiled at me.”

Tara gave a short chuckle and looked her up and down. “Of course he did,” she teased. “The kid’s only fourteen, but he’s got eyes.”

As Eugene wolf whistled, Carrie sighed in exasperation. “Come on, you know what I mean. He-”

“I know,” she said kindly. “He smiled at you…it’s a big deal.”

Glad she understood, Carrie looked back over towards Rick and Carl. They weren’t looking back anymore, Rick’s attention being dominated by Hayley and Connor who had come over to see Judith. Entertaining her and pestering him with questions about taking Judith onto their water slide, the children took all of his attention, and with that in mind Carrie turned her own attention elsewhere. In front of her Sam and Pete were talking animatedly, Pete nodding his head and raising his eyebrows in surprise. Glad that Sam was enjoying the time with his father so far, she glanced at Ron who sat on Pete’s other side, though she wasn’t surprised by what she saw.

Ron sat with his shoulders hunched and his head bowed, listening to music as he played games on his iPod touch. As she looked at him she felt a surge of unfair resentment, hating the fact that he had been so easily manipulated by his father. The heartache Ron was causing Jessie was terrible, and he knew exactly what he was doing to her. But at the same time as Carrie felt this resentment, she also pitied him. Ron’s situation was complicated and difficult, and he found himself caught between both of his parents…it was no small wonder that he had taken out his frustrations on Carl, that he was trying to cause hurt and pain to someone other than himself.

Catching the sound of poorly stifled giggles from beside her, she whirled around to look at Tara and Eugene, her eyes narrowed in suspicion. “What?” she asked, dreading the answer.

They giggled again, and then Tara answered, “Eugene just wants to know how far up your legs the tan goes.”

“I’m also willing to concede that you’re right,” he commented, leaning forward to look at her properly. “In that dress, your breasts are at least a D cup. I’m still willing to verify it though.”

Having come to expect crude but ultimately innocent comments like this from Eugene, Carrie just rolled her eyes, but she cringed a little when she glanced down at her lap. Now that she had sat down her dress was beginning to ride up her legs, and she tugged on the hem to pull it back down a little…it hadn’t seemed this short when she put it on.

“Don’t do that,” Tara said, nudging her side. “Look.”

Following the instruction, Carrie raised her head in the direction that Tara was pointing, and a stupid grin crossed her face when she caught Rick turning away. He’d been looking in her direction, and as she pictured his blue eyes casting themselves over her legs once again she was reassured in her choice of clothing.

A hush began to slowly sweep the church, the last stragglers beginning to take their seats as Gabriel entered the church and made his way down the aisle. He stopped and talked to people as he made his way to the front, wishing some a happy Father’s Day and shaking their hands. He did the same with Pete and his sons and then turned to Rick, beaming as he looked down at Judith and stroked her head. Having become well accustomed to Gabriel thanks to Carol taking her to church, Judith smiled sweetly at him and offered him one of her crackers. Continuing, he quickly concluded his greetings as he reached the front, and it was there that he stopped to speak to the group of three who occupied the front pew every week…a group who had once been four.

Deanna, Reg and Spencer had slowly begun emerging from the weight of their grief in the last week, resuming their former roles in the community step by step. It had been just over a month since Aidan’s death on the supply run, and it was a relief to see his family returning to the community, coming up for a breath of fresh air. The weight of Aidan and Noah’s deaths would be felt for a long time to come, particularly for the Monroe family, but even as this thought occurred to Carrie, so too did another. It was startling to realise that she hadn’t really given Noah much thought over the last week or so, that his absence hadn’t been on her mind. It was understandable in some respects, a great deal had happened since his death, but she still felt a horrible shiver of guilt. That was simply the way it was these days…people died, and other people moved on. There was nothing anyone could do about it.

“Good morning, everyone,” Gabriel began, his voice a little soft until he cleared his throat and spoke again. “Or should I say, good afternoon?” he corrected himself, pausing while the congregation gave a small chuckle. “I’ve dedicated my service to the Sunday morning mass for well over a decade now, but I must admit it was nice to have a sleep in this morning. We will begin our Father’s Day service with the hymn, Great is Thy Faithfulness, on page twelve.”

Moments later everyone began to stand, murmurs breaking out ever so briefly before they fell silent again. Doing what everyone else did, Carrie stood and reached for the Bible in the back of the pew in front of her.

“No, no,” Tara whispered hastily, taking the Bible from her and swapping it for a small booklet. “This one.”

Grateful, Carrie took her booklet and opened up to the correct page, finding it just as the church organ began to sound. Feeling like a fish out of water she tried her best to participate as the congregation broke out into song, but already she got the feeling that this would be her only attendance to Gabriel’s church service. Quickly getting distracted, she looked around as much as she could without being too obvious, and it was inevitable that she look at Rick across the aisle. Like her, he wasn’t really paying attention to the hymn being sung, more focused on entertaining Judith who he held on his hip. He opened his mouth and let her feed him a cracker, a grin crossing her face when he closed his lips around her knuckles and pretended to bite. Judith’s shriek of laughter was audible over the singing, but no one seemed to mind. Babies got away with anything, even in church.

A few minutes later the hymn came to a conclusion, the music and voices fading into silence. Still holding the booklet Carrie wondered if there was something else to do now, if they were going to pray.

“Please be seated.”

Just like before there was a murmur of voices as the church did so, Rick quickly trying to shush Judith as silence fell once again. Resuming her seat, Carrie put the booklet of hymns back where Tara had taken it from, and then immediately regretted it. Not quite sure of herself she wanted something to do with her hands, something to hold, to occupy her lifelong habit of fidgeting. What now? Should she pick up the Bible? Would they follow along while Gabriel read passages she would never fully understand?

“Practice what you preach,” Gabriel began slowly, enunciating the words of the well known phrase. “In my mind, this also includes the advice to preach what you practice. It’s for the latter advice that I have never before preached on Father’s Day. To preach a sermon on Father’s Day, when I myself was not a father felt fraudulent.”

Despite her best attempts, Carrie felt herself quickly tuning out what it was Gabriel preaching, her interest having not been immediately caught. Finding no immediate connection to what Gabriel had to say, her mind automatically drifted, seeking something else that would capture her interest.

Glancing at Tara beside her, who to Carrie’s surprise was paying attention, she smiled on the inside. Though she’d technically not been any further away from her family in the second house than she had been before, she hadn’t seen a great deal of them since she had temporarily moved in with Jessie. They worked together outside the walls, sometimes they kept one another company while on watch, but it wasn’t quite the same as before. Knowing that soon she would be coming home to Rick was a relief on more than one level. Aside from the fact that Carl knew about their relationship, their previous lives would resume, things would go back to normal. She missed her group…her family.

All she had left to do was get Jessie through Father’s Day and into next week, and then she’d be home. Monday night would be the last she spent with Jessie. Leaving her home wouldn’t mean that her support or friendship would come to an end, but now was the time for Carrie to take care of herself, to look after her own needs - and right now those needs were for her to be at home. It was more than just missing her family. She missed Rick, she was impatient to start their life together, for that was the inevitable progression. They both knew their relationship was going somewhere, they had said as much already. The idea was exciting, and it filled her with hope and anticipation for the future. She didn’t know exactly what it was going to bring, but she knew that as long as she and Rick were sharing their lives with one another, things would be okay.

Looking over at Rick again, she smiled as she watched Judith trying to drive him crazy, the little girl filled with restless energy. She sat in his lap, but her hand had a strong grip on his right ear lobe, and she giggled to herself as she tugged on it and then let go, ignoring his attempts to make her stop. Upping her game a little, she clambered to her feet and stood up in his lap, not noticing the way he flinched as her shoes dug into the top of his thigh. She reached into his hair now, still grinning as she trailed her fingers through his curls and then tugged…gently at first, and then harder. He scolded her now, pushing her hand out of his hair and looking at her sternly. Unperturbed, Judith kept smiling as she stroked her fingers over the stubble on his face, unsuccessfully trying to tug on it. When she saw that she couldn’t do it she turned away from him with a huff of impatience. She whined until he put her down on the floor, and though Carl tried to entice her over towards him, she had other plans.

Thrilled, Judith wandered out into the centre of the aisle, standing silently as she took in the knowledge that she was free, that she could go and do as she pleased. Looking this way and that, she tentatively took a few steps towards the door as though she was going to make a run for it, but then turned around the other way. Seeing Gabriel standing at the front she slowly began making her way up there, capturing the attention of everyone she wandered past. Happily basking in all the smiles and attention she was receiving, she wandered up the front and then disappeared as she headed towards where the Monroe’s were sitting. Seconds later her head popped up again, her smile wide as she sat on Deanna’s lap.

“Like our earthly fathers do, God makes choices for us,” Gabriel continued preaching, though his eyes too were briefly drawn to Judith. “We don’t always understand the choices he makes, we don’t always trust them either. In our worst moments we cry out to him, and we ask why he has forsaken us, where he is in our time of need. It takes a great deal of faith and understanding to trust in the Lord’s choices, but trust in them we must. The choices he made for us, as our heavenly father…he made these choices before he even formed you.”

Not content to sit still for very long, Judith was back on the move very quickly, abandoning the Monroes and wandering back down the aisle. Carrie could see Rick watching her in exasperation, a keen eye peeled for any sign of her making trouble or causing a disturbance. Making her choices carefully, Judith stopped by another pew and squeezed herself past the feet and legs that were in her way, but reappeared a few seconds later, apparently dissatisfied with those she met.

“The Bible tells us many stories of fathers, but I’d like to bring up one in particular, one who I feel is often overshadowed by the son bestowed upon him. I’m talking about Joseph of course, the carpenter, the husband of Mary. Just as God chose a righteous woman to bear his son and raise him, so too did he choose a man to be his earthly father. But what does this tell us about…well, us?” Gabriel asked, pausing to let them consider this question. “It tells us that just as God chose an earthly father for his son, Jesus, he has chosen fathers for his other children. Us. He chose John and Leanne Aldridge to be Hayley’s first mom and dad,” he continued, gesturing to Hayley who sat at the front with the other children. “Just as he chose Anna and Michael to be her next mom and dad. He-”

Cutting him off, Judith let out a loud shriek of delight as she bolted down the aisle, drawing a sigh of exasperation from Rick and amused laughter from everyone else. Thriving on the attention, Judith was beaming as she flew past her father and dodged his delayed attempt to grab her. Just as it looked like she was going to keep running she slowed down to a stop, her attention having been captured by something behind her. To Carrie’s surprise Judith was looking right at her, her big blue eyes fixed on the dress she was wearing. As though drawn by a magnetic force she slowly turned and came back, falling silent as she peered at the flowers. A low chuckle swept the church again, and at the front Gabriel was shaking his head in amusement.

Holding her breath, Carrie watched as Judith reached out and touched the fabric of her dress, and she wondered what she was going to do next. It had only taken three months, but by now Carrie and Judith were fairly accustomed to one another, although there was still a great deal of uncertainty that she felt about the little girl. Rick’s daughter was a big deal, it was important that Carrie know her, that she understand her needs…that she know how to take care of her. She was slowly getting there, but she’d never had anything to do with children before the outbreak, babies in particular. She glanced up at Rick, seeing that he was trying to decide whether or not to get out of his pew and force Judith to behave, to maybe take her outside and let her run around. When they made eye contact Carrie gave him a nod of reassurance, despite not feeling completely certain that she had this under control. Moments later Judith was tugging on her dress with a low whine.

“She wants to get up,” Tara whispered.

Taking the chance, Carrie leant forward and put her hands under Judith’s armpits, relieved to see her looking happier now. Grateful she wasn’t too heavy she lifted the child up and brought her onto her lap, breathing a mental sigh of relief when she happily settled. Rather pleased, Judith took a few moments to look at the painting on her cast before turning her attention back to the flowers on her dress. Doing the same thing, she admired the pretty yellow dress that Judith was wearing, one that Rosemary had made for her. Rick must have dressed her in it for the special occasion…it wasn’t often he chose to put her in overly fanciful dresses, despite having quite the selection to chose from.

“It was no accident or chance that little Judy was born to Rick and his wife, it was no matter of luck,” Gabriel continued warmly, politely rousing attention again. “The Lord chose them to be her parents, and he chose them for a reason.”

It was rather pleasant to have Judith sitting on her lap, enjoying her gentle weight and company. She raised her head and looked up at Carrie, her cheeks flushed pink as she reached up towards her head. Somehow knowing what she wanted, she removed the sunglasses she had on and passed them to her, letting her take them in her hands and look at them.

“God’s plan is infinite in its wisdom. Just like he did for Hayley, he chose Lori Grimes to be Judith’s first mom, and he already knows who will be her next.”

Carrie’s heart seemed to skip a beat, for there was no missing the implication of what Gabriel had just said. It had of course occurred to her that as her relationship with Rick progressed and became increasingly serious, one day she would be expected to take the role of Judith’s mom. With her imminent return and Carl’s developing acceptance of their relationship, her new role for Judith was close on the horizon. What would be the parameters? What did Rick want or expect from her? How did Carl feel about the idea?

Looking down at Judith, Carrie tried to reassure herself, knowing that she wasn’t alone in this. Judith was Rick’s daughter…it was up to him to determine what he wanted Carrie to be for her, what he felt his daughter did and didn’t need. He wouldn’t leave her alone to flounder in the uncertainty, he would be there by her side. Just as she started to feel a small amount of relief, Judith drew a deep breath and then sneezed loudly. She blinked rapidly, as surprised by her body’s involuntary spasm as Carrie was, and when she turned to look up at her she revealed the long line of snot dangling from her left nostril. The outbreak had accustomed her to many types of bodily fluids, snot included, and though puke was the only thing she couldn’t handle with dignity, Judith’s snot made Carrie’s stomach momentarily turn in revulsion.

Before she could even ask herself what she was going to do about this Rick was leaning across the aisle, holding out a wet wipe for her. Taking it gratefully, Carrie was reassured in her own belief that he would be there to support her as she developed a relationship with his daughter, with both his children. She quickly cleaned Judith up and then widened her eyes in surprise, for seconds later Judith gave a great sigh and leant her head against Carrie’s chest. Despite having so recently been full of energy she seemed to take a few moments to rest, and she got comfortable before sitting quietly, bring her hand to her mouth and sucking her thumb. Pleasantly surprised, Carrie glanced back up at Rick again, knowing she would find him watching her. They shared a brief smile, but her own began to fade a little sooner than she liked. Carl too was looking over at her, and though he didn’t seem displeased by the implications of what Gabriel had said about her and Judith, he didn’t seem thrilled about it either.

“God chose your father,” Gabriel continued speaking. “And in the same breath he chose your children. Yes, God also chose your children for you. Just as he chose Rick to be Carl and Judith’s father, in the same breath he chose Carl to be his son, and Judith to be his daughter. He chose Mikey to be Nicholas’ son, and he chose Courtney to be Kent’s daughter.” There was a brief pause, and then Gabriel continued, “He chose Pete to be Ron and Sam’s father, just as he chose them to be his children. Each and every one of God’s choices are made with us in mind. Your parents…your children…they are exactly who you need them to be, whether you know it or not, whether you trust it or not. Your needs, your path in life…all predetermined by him. God’s plan for you is perfect, and your parents and children are part of that plan…there’s no Plan B for God, because there doesn’t need to be.”

Carrie sighed to herself, feeling as though what had initially been warm hearted words of wisdom was now spoiled. This was what always got her about religion, the idea that God had a plan, that he did everything with people in mind. How was it a part of Ron and Sam’s path in life to be abused by their father? How was anything that happened to the world part of some greater plan for them?

Tuning out of the sermon once again, Carrie readjusted Judith in her lap and looked over at Rick and Carl again, glad to see they at least were listening, that perhaps they were even getting something out of what Gabriel had to say. She knew their relationship had taken bit of a hit in the last few weeks, that Carl had come to learn his father wasn’t perfect, that like everyone else he sometimes made poor choices. It was something that Carrie too had come to learn, that she had come to see in herself. It was easy to fall into the delusion that you were always right, that your beliefs and choices were the best to follow. Recently she and Rick had both fallen into this pitfall, he believing that he had to wait for the perfect time to tell Carl, and she trying to impose her own sense of right and wrong on him. They weren’t the only ones who had suffered for that, Carl had too.

But now things had changed, and she wilfully acknowledged that Rick had been right about many things. He was right about the depth of Pete’s grudge against him, and he was right about the fact that eventually, Carl would come home to him on his own. He’d repeatedly assured her that his son would call a truce with him when he had either punished him enough, or he needed something. The day he was attacked by the Wolves Carl found himself in need of his father’s support, and so he came home. Rick knew his son well, and through that experience Carrie had learnt to trust him even more.

Catching her off guard, Judith suddenly lurched in her lap and lunged to the right. More interested in Tara who had been teasing her, Judith dropped Carrie’s sunglasses with a loud clatter and climbed onto her lap instead. Though the baby’s short attention span ought not to be taken personally, Carrie lamented her departure, feeling like she missed her already. Her lap felt void now, her hands empty even as she leant forward and picked up her fallen sunglasses. Perfectly content, Judith sat on Tara’s lap and giggled as she pulled faces as her.

She glanced back to Rick once again, and by now he must surely be getting a crick in his neck. He had automatically turned around when he heard Judith making noise, but it was Carrie he made eye contact with. Smiling at her, he made her stomach flutter with butterflies, her heart warming as she held his gaze until he had to turn back around.

Not quite an hour later, Gabriel’s sermon drew to a close, and though she’d been happy enough to attend because Rick had asked her to, Carrie was glad that it was over. It was nice to hear some of the things Gabriel brought up earlier, but as the sermon continued Carrie’s ability to pay attention waned as boredom set in. As a low murmur arose now that the sermon finished Gabriel stepped down from the pew, smiling as he went to the children who sat together at the front, praising them for their attentiveness throughout. One who had been rather inattentive, Judith was still roaming the church going from person to person, but as people began to rise she returned to Rick and Carl. She looked at him urgently and pointed to the double doors, apparently indicating that it was time for them to go, but Rick simply pulled her up into his arms and settled her into his lap.

Wondering why he wasn’t getting up, Carrie frowned for a moment and then realised. In front of her Pete was ushering Ron and Sam to their feet, their group being one of the first to filter into the aisle and begin to depart. Rick on the other hand was waiting for him to go, making the necessary concessions to prevent the two families interacting. Carrie watched as they left, her eyes mainly focused on Ron who still appeared sullen and displeased by everything. It had surprised her to hear that Rick was considering telling Carl the truth about Shane and Lori, that he had accepted the fact that he couldn’t keep he and Ron apart forever. One day they would have to interact again, and despite his apparent agreement with Pete he still didn’t seem to trust that Ron would keep the secret to himself. On that note, Carrie didn’t trust that he would either. Having acknowledged this, Rick was right…it would be better for Carl to hear this news from his father than from someone who wanted to cause him pain.

When Pete and his children had left the church completely, Carrie, Tara and Eugene rose in their pew and began to follow, though at the last minute Carl darted out in front of them. He seemed exasperated, and he chased his sister down the aisle as she made a mad dash for freedom. She shrieked loudly as she evaded him, amused by the game.

“Judy! Wait!” he called in exasperation. “Get out of Brody’s way!”

Chuckling, Rick followed him, but he slowed to a stop at the mouth of Carrie’s aisle. There was a brief pause as they looked at each other, both struggling to hide their smiles.

“Did you learn something today?” he enquired politely.

“Oh, yeah,” she nodded, noticing the way his eyes momentarily dropped to the front of her dress. “I learnt about…Joseph.”

“And what did you learn about Joseph?” he teased, perhaps suspecting she hadn’t paid much attention.

She hesitated. “He had a son…named Jesus.”

Rick smiled in amusement, his eyes crinkling with mirth as he started to say something else, but he was abruptly cut off. “Heh-hem!” Eugene interrupted, ruining the moment.

Carrie and Tara both turned and looked at him, their eyes narrowing in annoyance. He seemed unconcerned that he was interrupting, and more concerned with what he might be missing out on outside the church. With a sigh she turned back to Rick and gave an apologetic shrug, but he didn’t seem concerned.

“Thank you for coming today,” he said sincerely.

At that he departed, but not before leaning over and pressing a gentle kiss to her cheek. Not bothering to hide her happiness she watched him go before following him out into the aisle, wishing that they had the opportunity to spend some time together that day. Ensuring she took the time to berate Eugene for his interruption she departed the church and emerged back into the warm sunshine on June, pleased by the progress the others had made with the set up. Two of their three gazebo’s had been erected, while Abraham and Tobin were checking the seventeen foot trampoline that had been repaired earlier in the week.

Almost immediately Carrie was whisked away in order to help with other things, further separated from Rick who had followed his children towards the trampoline. As she hid her reluctant to help, reminding herself that today was for Rick to spend with his children, she contented herself with the progress that had been made thus far. Even as he physically restrained Judith from climbing the ladder onto the trampoline, Rick was glancing her way, sharing his exasperated smile with her. The worst of everything was over now, things were changing for the better.

Hearing Shelly calling for her help, Carrie turned her attention to the task at hand, hastening to join the others at the Pantry. As she departed, already mentally taking stock of the tasks at hand, she was unaware that she was the subject of more than just Rick’s attention. From the shade of the trees Pete watched her as she went by, his face set into a darkening scowl of resentment.









Notes

Comments

@WalkerWalkerChick
No worries, I was just so happy to find it on the other site I read it there. There aren't too many Rick Grimes stories, and yours are among the best I have found. Really looking forward to your new story and the continuing journey of Rick and Carrie.

Grimesgirl63 Grimesgirl63
5/21/17

@Grimesgirl63
Thanks Grimesgirl63, that means a lot!

Sorry it took forever to update on this site! (to get the formatting right, the copy paste has to be done from a Word doc which I don't have on my laptop - this is why I fell so far behind posting on here).

In progress of posting first chapter of The New World as we speak - hopefully up in an hour or so. Happy reading :-)

This was a great ending to the story. Loved how you weaved in the elements of the series but made it your own. Looking forward to your new story!

Grimesgirl63 Grimesgirl63
5/21/17

Hi there - just wondering if you plan to update the story on this site. I noticed this story on another FF site and it was much further along. Either way,I started reading it over there. Thanks, it is getting really good.

Grimesgirl63 Grimesgirl63
5/10/17

Just wanted to let you know that I really enjoy this story. Thought the first one was good as well. Looking forward to the next chapter.

Grimesgirl63 Grimesgirl63
6/7/16